Just not necessary

I called for a taxi recently, and the first thing I heard after the phone had been picked up was the most world-weary and exaggerated sigh ever. Darth Vader couldn’t have done a better job. It was a woman, and I had already pissed her off, surely this was some kind of record.

I just couldn’t understand how this had happened. I’m sure it wasn’t a yawn, because it was spiked with hate, and it seemed deliberately affected for me. It felt as if she had been storing it up, and decided that that was it. The next person who phoned was going to get it. Once she had finished, I stated with apprehension that I required a taxi. “Destination,” she said with clear disdain, it wasn’t even a question, just an automated response that must have left a bad taste in her mouth. No one had ever despised their job this much. At some point this woman had been hired because of her people skills, and now she hated life. It’s not as if she was a weathered prostitute who was asked on a regular basis to perform the most despicable acts on the most despicable people, only to come home to get slapped in the face by a pimp’s dick. Only this would be enough to explain the level of contempt I felt through my earpiece.

I’m sometimes a bit nervous when speaking to service people. I tend to mentally rehearse what I’m going to say before hand, to avoid the embarrassment of wasting their time as I think under pressure. The problem with this is that I become too fixed on what I am going to say, so if they ask me questions in a different order to what I was expecting, I can’t deprogram myself, and carry on with my recital. For example, if I wanted to order some cider and crisps at the bar, it might go something like this:
“What can I get you?”
“Magners.”
“Do you want a glass for that?”
“Cheese and onion.”

It isn’t always this catastrophic, but it feels awkward and confusing to break this line of thought. If I am aware that there has been a change in plan, then the only way I can save myself is to try and wrangle the conversation in my direction. E.g. ordering a taxi might go something like this:
“Where do you want to be picked up from?”
“I would like to go to the train station.”
“Where are you now?”
“Can I have one in ten minutes please?”
“Did you say you wanted to go to the train station?”
“I’ll be waiting by the library.”